Things to do before your MAN goes astray

The following statement which I will make is completely true and applies to all Men:

99.99% people make a commitment (read: get married) forever with their mind set on staying faithful and committed for the rest of their lives.

I am sure that most of the women out there will go - "Rubbish. He checks out every moving thing that passes him. He will jump at the first opportunity he will get and take it with his arms open. etc. etc..."

But there is no greater myth than this. True - Men look at other women, admire them and even at times ogle at them. They fantasise about what it will be like to get intimate with one of those hot chicks on television. They might even have a huge collection of penthouses / Playboys somewhere in the attic. But the chances that he intends to betray you : very close to Zero.
Please read the line again - The chance that he intends to betray you - the keyword here is INTENDS.

Now when does the intention change? Why does he look outside? Why does the thought ever crosses his mind? What makes him break the sacred oath that he took while exchanging rings?

The answers, according to me, will be a concoction of the following points, in varying degrees, but all ingredients present nevertheless:

• Denying him physical pleasures for too long: Sex is one of the basic human urges. Even various studies have proved time and again that one of the most important ingredients of a successful relationship is what happens between the sheets. If the activity stops there, the relationship will start falling apart. I will not be exaggerating is I say that this is the glue that holds it all together. The only possible exception to this will be inactivity caused due to medical issues / accidents - but then again, there are chances (very slim though) that the man might go astray here also. A union without sex is like a bicycle with its front tire missing, will you be able to balance on it for too long? Chances are - you will fall off very soon.
• Lack of Trust There are things that we men do not like to communicate to our women. Specially about our problems, the issues we are facing - monetary, at work or at any other place. We do not want to trouble the women in our lives with too many issues which we think are insignificant and not important. Call us Male Chauvinist Pigs. Blame it on our genes. Even during the time men lived in caves and agriculture was not discovered, its the men who used to hunt and also protect their women from all dangers. Say whatever you want. But we men are like that only - we will not share 99% of our problems (read - insignificant in our eyes) with you. AND then sometimes, you (read: the women) come to know about it. Then what do you do? you simply decide that you cannot trust this person because he does not tell you everything - leads to your thinking - that he must have other skeletons in his closet - leads to the thought - he has a hidden past which is all bad and ugly, and then the demon grows and grows - until it starts haunting you day and night. Tell me if I am wrong. I am sure I am not and I am ready to bet anything on it. So all the women reading this - please trust us. We do not have any hidden skeletons. We are just, by our very genetic build, protective and hence do not share problems and smaller insignificant things. If you really want to know whats happening, just ask us straight - you will get your answers 99 out of 100 times.
• Lack of communication I know it sounds like an absolute idiot thing to write - On one hand I am saying that we will not share problems, and in the very next moment I am saying that lack of communication is an issue. The reality is - we men normally like to share our most intimate dreams with you - what we want to do, what we really are, what we want to be. And we want you to be the sounding board, the filter that will clean the dirt, the mirror from which we can reflect on. What if the filter is clogged and the mirror is all foggy? We will not be able to see a thing. And what happens next - we stop telling you our dreams. We stop telling you what we want to do in life. And Bingo, we are back again to the issue of lack of trust, and the demons attached with it. So please - the ladies reading this - please listen to our dreams and please assess them objectively. Do discuss the pros and cons, do show us the downsides, the issues, the problems which may come - but leave the decision to us. Chances are very bright that we will see your point and either solve the issue or take alternate action. But never - and i mean NEVER - shoot down a dream - It might be the most cherished dream of ours. And we will never share any other dream with you - ever again. The same is true in reverse also. Guys, please encourage your partners dreams - never shoot them down, let them see the whole picture as you see it and then let them decide.

Its really this simple. We men are by our very nature very simple creatures. Give us the three things mentioned above and we will be your slaves forever. We will do whatever you want and is within our powers to keep you happy and satisfied. We will bear all your tantrums with a big smile on our faces. All we are asking you is - please trust us, let us talk at times, and do keep the physical part of the relation lively.

signing off with a wish for a happy married life for everyone.

Saurabh

Woman Intuition and God

An icelander was granted one single wish from God: He asked "I want a road across Atlantic so that we Icelancers can drive back and forth to Europe."

God told him: "That is too much to ask. Find something easier."

So the man asked: "Please explain female intuition to me."

God replied: "About the highway - should it be 2 lanes or four lanes?"

Quotes on Marriage

Alfred Adler:
We only regard those unions as real examples of love and real marriages in which a fixed and unalterable decision has been taken. If men or women contemplate an escape, they do not collect all their powers for the task. In none of the serious and important tasks of life do we arrange such a "getaway." We cannot love and be limited.

Ambrose Bierce:
Love: a temporary insanity, curable by marriage.

Amy Bloom:
Love at first sight is easy to understand; it's when two people have been looking at each other for a lifetime that it becomes a miracle.

Ann Landers:
All married couples should learn the art of battle as they should learn the art of making love. Good battle is objective and honest--never vicious or cruel. Good battle is healthy and constructive, and brings to a marriage the principle of equal partnership.
Ann Landers Says Truth Is Stranger..., 1968

Anna Garlin Spencer:
The friendship between a man and a woman which does not lead to marriage or desire for marriage may be a life long experience of the greatest value to themselves and to all their circle of acquaintance and of activity; but for this type of friendship both a rare man and a rare woman are needed. Perhaps it should be added that either the man or the woman thus deeply bound in lifelong friendship who seeks marriage must find a still rarer man or woman to wed, to make such a three cornered comradeship a permanent success.

Anne Bradstreet:
If ever two were one, then surely we. If ever man were loved by wife, then thee.

Betty Friedan:
If divorce has increased by one thousand percent, don't blame the women's movement. Blame the obsolete sex roles on which our marriages were based.
speech, New York City, January 20, 1974

Bill Cosby:
For two people in a marriage to live together day after day is unquestionably the one miracle the Vatican has overlooked.

Danny DeVito:
There are two dilemmas that rattle the human skull: How do you hang on to someone who won't stay? And how do you get rid of someone who won't go?
The War of the Roses

Francis Bacon:
He that hath a wife and children hath given hostages to fortune.

Friedrich Nietzsche:
It is not a lack of love, but a lack of friendship that makes unhappy marriages.

GeorgE C. Lichtenberg:
Love is blind, but marriage restores its sight.

Gloria Steinem:
I have yet to hear a man ask for advice on how to combine marriage and a career.

Groucho Marx:
Some people claim that marriage interferes with romance. There's no doubt about it. Anytime you have a romance, your wife is bound to interfere.
The Groucho Phile, 1976

Hannah Arendt:
The right to marry whoever one wishes is an elementary human right compared to which "the right to attend an integrated school, the right to sit where one pleases on a bus, the right to go into any hotel or recreation area or place of amusement, regardless of one's skin or color or race" are minor indeed. Even political rights, like the right to vote, and nearly all other rights enumerated in the Constitution, are secondary to the inalienable human rights to "life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness" proclaimed in the Declaration of Independence; and to this category the right to home and marriage unquestionably belongs. [Dissent, Winter 1959]

Harriet Martineau:
Any one must see at a glance that if men and women marry those whom they do not love, they must love those whom they do not marry.

Helen Rowland:
Never trust a husband too far, nor a bachelor too near.

Homer:
There is nothing nobler or more admirable than when two people who see eye to eye keep house as man and wife, confounding their enemies and delighting their friends.

John Berger:
All weddings are similar, but every marriage is different.

Joseph Barth:
Marriage is our last, best chance to grow up.

Josh McDowell:
What you are as a single person, you will be as a married person, only to a greater degree. Any negative character trait will be intensified in a marriage relationship, because you will feel free to let your guard down -- that person has committed himself to you and you no longer have to worry about scaring him off.

Joyce Brothers:
Marriage is not just spiritual communion, it is also remembering to take out the trash.

Joyce Brothers:
My husband and I have never considered divorce... murder sometimes, but never divorce.

Katharine Hepburn:
If you want to sacrifice the admiration of many men for the criticism of one, go ahead, get married.

Louis K. Anspacher:
Marriage is that relation between man and woman in which the independence is equal, the dependence mutual, and the obligation reciprocal.

Lyndon B. Johnson:
Only two things are necessary to keep one's wife happy. One is to let her think she is having her own way, the the other, to let her have it.

Mark Twain:
After all these years, I see that I was mistaken about Eve in the beginning; it is better to live outside the Garden with her than inside it without her.
Adam, in Adam's Diary

Mark Twain:
Love seems the swiftest, but it is the slowest of all growths. No man or woman really knows what perfect love is until they have been married a quarter of a century.

Mignon McLaughlin:
A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person.

Mohandas K. Gandhi:
I first learned the concepts of non-violence in my marriage.

Nanette Newman:
A good marriage is at least 80 percent good luck in finding the right person at the right time. The rest is trust.

Ogden Nash:
To keep your marriage brimming,With love in the loving cup,Whenever you're wrong admit it;Whenever you're right shut up.

Ogden Nash:
Marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays and the other who never forgets.

Oscar Wilde:
Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence.

Pearl S. Buck:
A good marriage is one which allows for change and growth in the individuals and in the way they express their love.

Rainer Maria Rilke:
A good marriage is that in which each appoints the other guardian of his solitude.

Ralph Waldo Emerson:
Is not marriage an open question, when it is alleged, from the beginning of the world, that such as are in the institution wish to get out, and such as are out wish to get in?

Rita Rudner:
I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced pain and bought jewelry.

Robert C. Dodds:
The goal in marriage is not to think alike, but to think together.

Samuel Johnson:
Marriage is the triumph of hope over experience.

Simone Signoret:
Chains do not hold a marriage together. It is threads, hundreds of tiny threads which sew people together through the years. That is what makes a marriage last --more than passion or even sex!

Socrates:
My advice to you is to get married. If you find a good wife, you'll be happy; if not, you'll become a philosopher.

Tom Mullen:
Happy marriages begin when we marry the ones we love, and they blossom when we love the ones we marry.

W. H. Auden:
Like everything which is not the involuntary result of fleeting emotion but the creation of time and will, any marriage, happy or unhappy, is infinitely more interesting than any romance, however passionate.

Will Stanton:
Getting a dog is like getting married. It teaches you to be less self-centered, to accept sudden, surprising outbursts of affection, and not to be upset by a few scratches on your car.